Monthly Archives: February, 2015

My love language

I tell my kids that they can one hundred percent know, without any doubt, that I love them more than anything in the world…

because I let them put their freezing cold hands on my belly to warm them up.

The One Compatibility Test No One Talks About

I like to keep the temperature of my home really low in the winter and really high in the summer. My husband wants it always within 5 degrees of 70ºF. I find that ridiculous. I’ll change it when we have guests, or if I know I’ll be home all day, but generally I’ve got a 10º gap. It makes it easier to leave the house and not feel gross. And I like being cozy in a sweater … or three. Today it’s really really cold here, though. And we’re at home all day, which means that it’s just miserable to keep it as low as I like it, and I’ve turned it up, but most days we have a disagreement about where the thermostat should be set.

And, no, I don’t mean that the temperature you like a room at should be something you take into account. More, how uncomfortable will you allow yourself to be on a daily basis?

I dated a guy who kept his temperature at 75º in the winter and 62º in the summer. It made me extremely uncomfortable. Not because it wasn’t WONDERFUL to walk into his apartment, but because it felt so decadent. It was more than I deserved … no, that’s not what I mean. I mean that it wasn’t something I would ever pay for. And he hated that I wouldn’t change my apartment’s temperature for him.

It’s the same with the amount I walk. I have only twice ever gotten a cab for myself, and I would walk quite some distance to avoid a bus. Of course, I really like to walk. But I also just don’t see the need in comfort for comfort’s sake.

And it isn’t just a monetary issue. I mean, I’ll treat myself to expensive things, but not these.

There must be a better way to explain this. I really don’t mean being frugal. … Ugh. Maybe I’ll think of something in an hour and change this. Maybe you have a better idea?


I have been thinking a lot recently about little things I do that keep me from reverting back to the depressive state I feel like I lived so much of my life in. And one of those little things is to get naked every day. And I keep thinking, well, that just sounds ridiculous. I mean, who would believe me if I told them that being naked for a few minutes a day helps me stay normal.

And then, reading through the backlog of blogs I like to read I came across <a href=””>The Modern Mrs. Darcy’s discussion of putting on lotion</a>, and while she’s talking about getting nude to put on lotion, it still made me feel like I wasn’t as crazy.

In the cold I try so hard to be warm all the time, and I get lazy. I can’t be the only person who starts re-wearing clothes just so that I don’t need to spend time figuring out what to wear, because otherwise I’d turn my back on the day and lie back in bed. Or maybe I am?

But if I get up, have my water, and then force myself to get undressed in the bathroom to weigh myself, well, I can’t do that. And I’ll put on lotion, but more it forces me to strip myself of yesterday and last night. It’s a feeling of renewal and care. And maybe that isn’t as crazy as it’s been sounding lately. And if it is, maybe it doesn’t matter all that much, because I know that it’s been helping me. And it’s one little thing I can check off my mental to-do list. (No, I don’t write “get naked” into Omnifocus.)

So, if you’re feeling a little blue and the winter is getting to you, maybe you could start with getting up and getting naked, putting on clean clothes.

Or maybe I’m the only one who finds that depression makes me where the same clothes for weeks at a time.